Entries from November 2009 ↓

They would be mad if they did, but the rumours are that the I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here bods want Jedward (John and Edward of X Factor fame) to replace Katie Price in the jungle. They have been reportedly offered 50,000 each to do so.

Crazy or what?

John supposedly asked: “Can we do that? Are we celebrities?” Well it hasn’t stopped many other z-listers signing up on the chance that it could give them a career boost.

Now that Katy has left I’m A Celeb who is there, already in the jungle, to entertain us? Mmmmm, a difficult one.

You can see why the producers are scratching around for a big or controversial name to stimulate interest. And, whatever anyone thinks of Jedward, they would create an interest. But if they did enter the jungle they would surely be making a wrong move – even for 50,000.

YVES Rossy, aka the Swiss Jetman, has failed in his mission to fly solo across the Strait of Gibraltar using a single jet-propelled wing.

Africans looking for a better life in Europe will have to stick to the tried and tested method of trying themselves to empty petrol cans and hoping for a favourable current.

In 2008, Rossy, crossed the channel. The preferred method is to make the crossing in the back of a truck labelled Cleaning Equipment. But Rossy did it by air.

In this effort, Rossy set off from Morocco, zooming out of a small plane 6,500 feet over Tangier. He is tied to a carbon-fibre jet-propelled wing, with a span of more than 2m (6ft 6in). He will reach speeds of 138 mph.

He will also get wet because Rossy ended up in the sea.

Says an aviation expert:

If Ryan Air can guarantee a decent landing, Mr Rossy may yet be on to something. Perhaps airports can be giant sandpits?

Mr Rossy was rescued by helicopter. It is not believed he will try to gain asylum in the EU.

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HAVE you been accused of being a paedo? Has your name appeared on a child sex websites? Well, if you live in Texas, you need Lindeman, Alvarado & Frye, lawyers specialising in SOLICITIATION.

While we at Anorak are prone to the odd typo, we are not advertising our skills in getting you off a child molestation charge, her you might be looking for someone who checks the facts thoroughly.

But this is not the worst of. The law firm, as our picture shows, uses the picture of blonde, pouty-mouthed minor. Is this necessary? Did she trap you? Is this the face of temptation?

Presumably, the law firm also uses pictures for other crimes: a huge bag of diamonds for theft; a pair of knickers for rape; a woman draped over a pick-up truck for grand theft auto; and so on

Says the firm: “The Devastating Cost of a Conviction or Guilty Plea”

An accusation of child sexual assault, abuse or molestation can be life-altering. Without the help of an experienced defense lawyer, you may face lengthy imprisonment and mandatory lifetime registration as a sex offender.

Being accused of something you did not do is horrific. Being accused ot being a child molestor when you’re inncoent must be hell. So why the **** would anyone enter a guilty plea if they werent guilty? You’d fight it with all your energy.

There are also the personal costs. Your reputation and standing in the community may never be the same. Your family relationships may be damaged permanently. With this much at stake, can you afford to hire an attorney who is anything less than extremely wellversed in both the legal and personal aspects of these cases?

And who can spell?

At the law firm of Lindeman, Alvarado & Frye, our team of experienced criminal defense attorneys represent clients charged with a full range of sex crimes in which children were the alleged victims, including:

Child sexual assault
Child sexual abuse or molestation
Indecency with a child
Possession of child pornography (kiddie porn)
Internet stalking or sexual solicitation of a minor

If you were charged with child sexual assault or another sex crime in Houston or anywhere in southeast Texas, contact Lindeman, Alvarado & Frye today for a free and completely confidential consultation.

And – hey you might even get to meet the girl in the picture.

Spotter

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LAST time we saw Twilight actress Ashley Greene she was topless and bottomless showing off her Twits. Now shes graduated to lads mags and was celebrating her Maxim magazine cover with a party at Avenue in New York.

What happens next for the Twilight films teenage stars the confessional book, rehab or the porn spread? Or will the films just keep going…forever as an undead franchise, or at leat until Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart get their own nickname: Stinson, Pewart, Rosten..?

On Anythinghollywood you can hear Katie Holmes telling you the New Moon plot.

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YOU know you’ve arrived when you’re made into a wax statue. There is something creepy about waxworks. At Irelands National Wax Museum Television pundit Eamon Dunphy unveils a new waxwork of himself. Besides him a waxy Calum Best, doe-faced song to George Best, puts his arm around a candle made to look like his departed father and grins.

The only people who have ever looked exactly like their waxworks massed at David Gests wedding to Liza Minnelli. The bride and groom stood beside Michael Jackson and Liz Taylor looked less like flesh and bone humans being than a wax exhibit. This impression was encouraged by them all appearing to be on the point of melting, a single turn of the central heating dial from turning into puddles. And then there is this lot who seem to be turning into wax.

The Worlds Worst Michael Jackson Waxworks

Nicole Kidman, Simon Cowell And Pope Benedict Meet For Dublin Summit

Michael Jackson In The Worlds Most Bizarre Waxwork Ehibition

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STANDALONE. The museum director and Calum Best (right) unveil a new waxwork of his father, the late football legend George Best, to mark the fourth anniversary of his death at The National Wax Museum Plus in Dublin today.

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Although Lindsay Lohan’s first collection with Ungaro may not have gone so well, with even the founder, Emanuel Ungaro (who is no longer with the company) “blasting” her efforts, the actress is still with the Ungaro fashion house.

“Yes (she’s staying on), she has a job to do,” [President and Chief Executive Mounir Moufarrige] said on the sidelines of the Milan Fashion Global Fashion Summit.

“The criticism was harsh. I am sure we can do better in the collection to be honest but I think it was harsh … But it did sell well,” Moufarrige said.

Apparently, Britain’s Havey Nichols and Harrods stores as well as Bloomingdales and some Japanese stores were interested in the collection.

As for Emanuel Ungaro’s criticism?

“Mr Ungaro has his views, he can keep them. I have no comment,” Moufarrige said.

This must be a nice boost for Lindsay!

Photos by INF