Entries Tagged 'Gossip' ↓

KELLY Osbourne is sating an American skater-boi called Braydon Szafranski. 

Szafranski has “OZZY” tattooed on his knuckles.

Kelly’s dad is called Ozzy Osbourne. Coincidence?

No. Says Szafranski on ESPN:

“I got that because when I was born, my dad got Black Sabbath Volume 4 to take me home from the hospital because he wanted it to be the first music I ever heard. So I’ve always been a huge fan, since the day I was born.”

As the image of inked knuckles colliding with primary sexual characteristics infests your brain, I realaise that this all explains the markings on my knuckles that say ‘CAROLE’…

…and JERRY.

)

Did that work? Has it stopped ? Have the images of the dad knuckles and Kelly stopped..?

IN South Korea, The Diary of Anne Frank is a story of seduction, romance, 1980s fashions and a model who looks like Brian Eno.

Spotter: Kotaku

The news of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin’s split was so huge, it crashed GOOP (Gwyneth’s website) with all the people trying to see their announcement for themselves. One phrase that’s got everyone buzzing is what, exactly, the term “conscious uncoupling” means. While Gwyneth and Chris vacation with their kids in the Bahamas, mental health professionals are explaining the term to the rest of us.

Author Katherine Woodward Thomas developed a 5-week program to help divorcing couples navigate the breakup. She’s apparently the one who coined the term “conscious uncoupling.”

RELATED: Does Gwyneth Paltrow have an “image problem”?

Although Ms. Thomas didn’t make a scheduled interview with USA Today, the newspaper did reach psychiatrist Gail Saltz, an associate professor at The New York Presbyterian Hospital Weill-Cornell School of Medicine, who explained:

It is a nicer way of saying, ‘We’re getting a divorce,’ because it sounds prettier. It does provide further explanation for their particular situation — which is ‘we worked on it and came to a mutual decision we’re not staying together’ and it’s in a shorter number of words, which is good for media. It’s semantics but in a nice little package.”

So, yeah, it’s pretty much what it sounds like. Have you heard of the phrase “conscious uncoupling” before or was it a new one for you?

Photos by FAME

AND so it came to pass that Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin are no longer together. She made the announcement on her website Goop. They have not split up. They have had a ”conscious uncoupling”. They are like two parts of an inter-city train that has run its course. He heads into the Pumpkin cafe on Reading Station to eat a burger and crisps. She gets her pipes ABS system flushed with coconut water.

Or maybe they are a car uncoupling from a caravan: he the five-year-old Volvo estate; she the plumbed-in yurt.

The message reads:

It is with hearts full of sadness that we have decided to separate. We have been working hard for well over a year, some of it together, some of it separated, to see what might have been possible between us, and we have come to the conclusion that while we love each other very much we will remain separate. We are, however, and always will be a family, and in many ways we are closer than we have ever been. We are parents first and foremost, to two incredibly wonderful children and we ask for their and our space and privacy to be respected at this difficult time. We have always conducted our relationship privately, and we hope that as we consciously uncouple and coparent, we will be able to continue in the same manner.

Love,


Gwyneth & Chris

You’d think that the two people on Planet Earth don’t write “conscious uncoupling” and laugh are ideally suited. Or too similar.

The big shock, of course, is that the child they called Apple has yet to post any selfies on their iPhone. What’s the point of branding if you don’t get the freebies?

THIS Lip Tester is from circa 1948:

Spotters:  Vintage Sleaze via Messy Nessy Chic

READERS who recall stories of Chelsea footballer Ashley Cole’s vomit-fuelled extra-martial sex will enjoy the Sun’s report on the player’s love affair with “Ex-Towie star” Pascal Craymer:

ROMEO Ashley Cole has been made to wait THREE MONTHS for sex with his new flame.

Is that Romeo the symbol of doomed eternal love? Romeo who wrote in his book:

When I heard Jonathan Barnett (player’s agent) repeat the figure of £55K, I nearly swerved off the road. He (former Arsenal Director David Dein) is taking the piss Jonathan! I yelled down the phone. I was so incensed. I was trembling with anger. I couldn’t believe what I’d heard.

Romeo of whom it was said:

“We started having sex but it wasn’t long before he said he felt sick again. Then he just rolled over and vomited on the floor, all over the cream carpet. It was disgusting. He had some mouthwash, then jumped back into bed…Eventually he finished and collapsed on to my chest. He was panting and clearly had a good time.”

As Romeo said:

Bid a sick man in sadness make his will:
Ah, word ill urged to one that is so ill!…

Says [Juliet] Ceaymer:

“I don’t just fall into a guy’s arms. I make him earn it. Jennifer Aniston made Brad Pitt wait nine months for sex.”

And they’re still together, aren’t they?